Hotel Hustles

Hotel Hustles

By a rough count, I have spent 100 nights per year in hotels for many decades. I can not say I enjoyed my stay with all of them. But it was all a call of duty and the experiences made life that much more dramatic, more bittersweet, the way life should be.

My first ever hotel stay was during my visit to Delhi, also my first. I stayed at a run-down Hotel Jai Hind in the heart of Chandni Chowk, Old Delhi. My daily allowance of Rs 40 took me only that far. I landed at the old Delhi station by train and took a cycle rickshaw to the hotel. The owner of the hotel was already on his third drink and did not bother to check me in. He simply gave me the key to a room. 

Noises made by a young couple in the next room eluded sleep that night. The hotel owner said the next morning something in a hushed tone that Harayana police picked up runaway lovebirds. That explained the yelling and screaming that I thought was my dream. 

The hotel was in the middle of popular street food heaven, and I enjoyed two days of mouth-watering Delhi chats and Chole-Bhature for all my meals.

In later visits to Delhi, I stayed at a hotel in Ramnagar across from the New Delhi railway station. I used to hire a young Sardar auto-rickshaw driver for the day. He woe me up with a piping hot tea he brought for me in an earthen pot. 

The most enjoyable feature of this hotel was the chef making rounds of all rooms, asking patrons what would they like to eat. Another redeeming part was that bar did not close no matter what hours.

In Ludhiana, we used Hotel Surtaj as our boarding and the office. When the power tripped, the owner of the hotel set up table-chairs under a tree and we would work happily taking a break to go to our room and enjoy a swig of beer.  

I frequented Hotel Dasapraksha in Madras and Cannanore. On my departure, I would pass through a lineup of chefs, waiters, janitors, and gatekeepers to receive tips. I kept adequate change in my pocket to ensure they remember me well for my next stay.

Dasapraksha in Cannanore had a bar overlooking the ocean and luminous sunsets. The bartender, ever eager to please me, left neat raw of whiskey pegs with soda and munching so that I do not have to disrupt my trance of watching the foaming sea, the twinkling lighthouse, and magic of moonlight till midnight.

In my early years at Calcutta, I never stayed in a hotel, as my company had a guest house in Middleton street. On one of the first visits, I landed in a bar called 007, and in the middle of my third beer got a handwritten note from a friend to join him at his table. 

A few years ago, I stayed at Taj Bengal, or ITC Sonar Bangla, both magnificent hotels with service to match.

Hotel Millennium Mayfair is my favorite in London with a convenient location close to Berkeley Square where I worked. Chester Grosvenor at Chester was my second home when I worked in the UK and visited there every week. I like its quaint location and European feel.

I have spent weeks writing reports in the Candlewood Suites, Houston. We were a merry group who cooked and cleaned and drank countless whiskeys in this studio apartment hotel. 

I dislike hotels in Paris as rooms are the closest size and the French still think they own the world.

If you want quiet efficiency and cleanliness, you would do well to stay in German or Swiss hotels. One in Berlin is my all-time favorite. Lady at reception there made me feel at home even though she could not speak a word in English. 

Hotels in the Middle East are faceless and colorless. Those in Singapore are too opulent to feel comfortable.

The most memorable stay I recall was in Four Seasons, Hoston. They had sent me a questionnaire about my likes. Thoughtfully, they had got some CDs of Indian classical music and a pair of Nikes in the closet for my morning walk. 

Nowadays, I only stay at Hotel Aram in Jamnagar, my hometown and since the staff knows me well, no wonder I get the best food and services there.

At home, when I wake up in the middle of the night, I still search for a light switch to find out where is the bathroom. 

I have lost my bearings after all these years of staying in hotels; you see.